Friday, February 17, 2012

this sh*t is bananas

it was about two weeks ago, when i bought a 3lb bunch of bananas at bj's wholesale club. they were the most electric green bananas i had ever purchased! for serious - electric might not even describe the color they were!

now, i have purchased bananas from bj's many times. and something you should be aware of is bj's bananas seem to have a much shorter shelf life than most bananas found anywhere else. i don't know what it is... they maybe last half as long as your typical grocery store banana. here is the way it goes down. you buy bananas at bj's. green, yellow, greenish-yellow, whatever color they are. though they are generally some shade of green. they quickly turn yellow within a day or two. then you have very little time before they turn brown and spotty.

basically, you have to really like bananas - eat them every day kind of like - or have intentions of baking something with them to make it worth buying the 3lb bunch at bj's. otherwise you are just wasting money and bananas.

so, back to the bananas i purchase almost two weeks ago and their super electric green color they radiated... they are still green! two weeks later and they are still green!!!!!!!!!!

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look at 'em! and this isn't even the shade they were when i bought them. i'd have to say, the color died down a little over the past two weeks.

now, i thought to myself, "maybe they are just green on the outside, but ripening on the inside..." like, some sort of strange phenomenon. nope - not the case. i know this because i brought one of these green bananas to work the other day and attempted to peel/eat it.



this is what it looked like after my attempt to peel the green banana. wtf! the peel was tough. so tough that it wouldn't peel. flat out wouldn't peel. what was weirder? the inner peel - you know, directly beneath the outer peel - seemed like tree bark. rough and tough tree bark! belongs on a tree, tree bark. look at it. tell me it doesn't look like tree bark!



what i did next was, i used my hands and snapped the banana in half. it snapped cleanly and easily. look at that banana! you try doing that with a yellow banana. no way, jose. then i poked the fruit inside to see just how hard it was. hard as rocks. well. not really rocks. but pretty friggin' hard for a banana that i bought two weeks earlier. it didn't even smell like a banana. it was virtually void of aroma.

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the rest of the green bark rock hard bananas are still sitting in my kitchen. i'm not sure what to do with them just yet. i can't bring myself to throw them out. there is something inside of me telling me to keep them for a bit longer - just to see.

maybe they will turn yellow. maybe they will be forever green. maybe one day i will wake up and they will be black. or, maybe one day i will walk in to my kitchen and they will just be petrified in their green state. i don't know. but i want to find out how this one ends.

.........jfk........

Friday, February 3, 2012

big sale

yard sale at kenney marketing just got bigger!

im a professional

i work for an advertising agency - at least that is what boss-man calls this place.

i do ads, packaging, websites (yeah right), web banners, product tours, brochures and bla bla bla. basically anything you want, we would do; including signage.

just look at what i did today!



you see that beautifully designed sign? sure you do - need a closer look?



there she is! i'm a professional. yep.

............jfk............